I like to blog once every six or so months. Keeps the writing skills in shape.

One day, you guys. One day this will be a thriving blog with a fresh, new look and an author who writes on it more than never. It may not happen until the restored Eden, but it will happen.

Anyhoos. How is every all of you? To catch you up on all the exciting haps of my life (work and TV), here’s a little listy! (It is Friday, after all.)

  1. Apparently I am birthing a baby within the next three-ish weeks. Umm….

Here’s a bit of a progression for you. It’s gotten super-sized around here.

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I am having a baby so soon! I have decided that I am not one of those women who loves being pregnant. Good for those of you who are, but I find the hefting and maneuvering and groaning to get out of bed eighty times a night to go to the bathroom a bit excessive. Not my cup of tea. I’ve also had some issues with uterine fibroids (non-cancerous tumors on my uterus) that have sent me to the ER a few times, so that hasn’t helped. Overall, I’m ready to be not pregnant again.

It’s getting really exciting! I am feeling ready to meet this little man who is constantly kicking and punching and hiccuping. (What is he so busy doing in there? Sometimes he’s so active — very important things to do and nowhere to go.) What’s he like? Will we get along? Is he going to like Friday Night Lights? All things we need to know.

But then sometimes I am super nervous about it. First of all: labor. They showed us a nice little video at our prenatal class, and the lady in the video gave birth naturally, and she looked like she was having a semi-tough time, but mostly the baby just kind of slid out of her and then they celebrated and laughed and cried. Then we went home and I looked up some You Tube videos. HORRIFYING. These women were near death and screaming and HORRIBLE things were happening to their unmentionables. I can’t do it. Put me to sleep and take him out of my belly somehow and wake me in three months when my body has recovered.

Second of all: after labor, I have a baby! What do I do with him? What if he makes me cry all the time? (I hear that he will.) What if he isn’t into the food I offer him? What if he doesn’t like Friday Night Lights? Yikes.

Seriously, though, it’s pretty exciting. I already can tell that I love him so much, and I’ve put the Shema in his room so we can work on loving the Lord right away. This baby is making me a bit sappy though. The other day I started crying because pretty soon I won’t feel him in my belly anymore, and I felt sorry for Andrew who has never gotten to feel him move around inside of him, and then I watched an episode of Call the Midwife where a baby is born early and they think it’s dead, but then it’s alive! I pride myself on not letting my emotions control me.

Also, I get to buy him old man sweaters and teacup piglet hats.

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2. I have one more week of work before I go on my year-long maternity leave. Canada! You’re amazing. I’m so, so grateful to have the year. But it’s also weird to be leaving work for a year but not officially quitting. Work has been awesome lately — I got to teach a college Bible class, and this past summer I facilitated the whole church doing the Community Bible Experience where we read the New Testament together. I think I might miss work a bit.

3. What are all of the Netflix shows I should watch while I’m up feeding at 4 a.m.? Please leave suggestions. Unfortunately, Canadian Netflix is different than American, so probably only about half of what you recommend will be available to me. If so, I’ll allow you to mail me DVDs of the recommended shows. Thanks.

4. Did I tell you I got to hold a piglet the other day? Cause I did.

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5. After Target abandoned me they have apparently decided to start shipping to Canada. Except that Andrew heard a radio report and Target apparently is the worst at knowing how to plan to do business in a foreign country. The prices online are super high, which is because of the exchange rate. But most companies temper those prices because they know people will have to pay a lot for shipping. But not Target! Some lady tried to buy a pair of $25 pajamas and after Target added in her shipping costs and everything, her bill was over $70. So, basically, if Target doesn’t do like other companies and lower costs so that the overall price is manageable, no Canadians are going to order from them and they’ll shut down the online shipping and fail again! Target! For the love of all that is beautiful and Oh Joy and Nate Berkus, please get it together!

6. I don’t know what it means to whip or nae nae. I think I have a general idea of what “on fleek” means.

7. Canada just had an election. The season lasted for like 60 days or something and everyone was dying because it was so long and they were so tired of politics. Sweet, innocent Canadians.

OK, I have things to do, people. (Mindy Project, eating, maybe some freelance.) How are you? Leave me a little note to let me know. Joves!

 

 

Friday is in the house! (Is that still a phrase? From the early 90s? … Got it.) Listy times!

1. I need to write this Friday Listday in a hurry because I am about to work out. Right after I finish this donut.

2. So for Christmas Andrew got the game Killer Bunnies from his friend Lisa. It has caused us to break up about six times so far.

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It is the weirdest, most fun, most random, oddest game ever. Your goal is to have the winning carrot and to collect bunnies. But there are millions of cards that attack bunnies or add carrots or take away all of your things. I can’t explain it you guys. (Clearly.) All I have to say is that it’s super fun but it may cause break-ups if someone doesn’t let it go if he doesn’t get his way or if someone pouts and refuses to talk and gets super passive-aggressive when her plans fail. It really brings out the best qualities in everyone. Play it now!

3. My friend Kim just emailed me and told me all about how she has started watching Friday Night Lights because it is the best. show. on. earth. She asked if it was pathetic that she cried over the lives of fictional characters in Dillon, Texas. First of all, I refuse to believe they are fictional. Coach and Tami and Landry are real. Secondly, NO. Thirdly, I want to watch the whole series again. Andrew, let’s do it this weekend.

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4. You know that commercial where the lady is getting her nails done and then she goes and eats chips and ruins her fresh manicure? Do you know where this is going? Because, yes, that was me the other day. Excelling at life as usual.

5. Are you looking for a way to keep the squirrels in your life more comfortable? Probably the answer is, yes. You’re welcome.

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6. Guys, the Olympics start in just a few weeks! It’s the most wonderful time of the every two years! My favorite winter Olympic sports are figure skating, downhill skiing and speed skating. I cannot even wait. As soon as the Olympics start I am suddenly in love with sports I have never heard of and would never watch in any other circumstance. I also suddenly feel quite patriotic.

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7. Guys, I am feeling sad. On Sunday I go back to Colorado. It will be great to see my friends, but I am sad to leave Andrew and to not know when I will be coming back. I am hoping to hear news about my visa in early February, and I am praying that there are no more delays and that they send me a letter telling me to get to Canada as fast as I can and that they’ll be waiting at the border for me with a hug and a Tim Horton’s gift card. But until then, I am sad to leave my boo.

Ok, friends! Have a great times weekend. Buy killer bunnies and play with friends who will soon become enemies! See you soon!

 

I Hate Everyone

March 30, 2012

It’s Friday of Spring break — last chance to party (or hang out in the library)!

Let’s do it up — Friday Listday style.

1. Yesterday, whilst doing a routine image search for “teacup piglet,” I discovered that my blog happens to come up in that search. That’s odd, isn’t it? Also, if you’re my Facebook friend, you should check out my profile now because that goodness is only lasting another couple of days.

It is time for some darlingness!

He just wanted to take a tiny moment to make sure he wasn’t running a tiny little bit late.

2. I am sad because none of this week’s videos will post directly onto the bloggy. But if you like Friday Night Lights you should go check out this video. It’s Friday Night Lights if it were a women’s basketball team. Also, there’s some gender confusion. “Two Arms, Two Legs, Let’s Go!”

3. You guys. My phone number has been compromised. I received 12 calls from weird numbers yesterday. Twelve. How did this happen? If you call and I yell at you, please forgive me.

4. Here’s another video that you must watch if you’re a fan of Downton Abbey. My friend Rebekah showed it to me, and it cracked me up. Things are tense over at Downton Arbys.

5. This sweet old lady and I hate everyone.

6. So, remember how I’ve talked about Axis before? I’m on their board and they travel the country speaking to high school and college students about worldview and media and like such as? Well, I have a favor to ask. They’re trying to get a grant, and part of the deal is getting votes from people like you. If you just click this link and then click “vote” I will be so appreciative and I might quit nagging you. It’s seriously super, super easy. Thanks, bloggy friends!

7. Here are some things that make me happy: It is supposed to be 84 degrees tomorrow. I feel like I’m making progress on my thesis proposal (but oh my word, then I have to actually write a thesis!). I have really good and thoughtful and consistent and nice friends. I have a good roommate. I am learning so much about my God who is active in every sense of the word and has asked me to act as well.

Have a good and joyful and amazingtastic weekend!

 

Gifts of Goodness

March 9, 2012

Friday Listday is about to come at you like a whirlwind.

1. Oh, man, you guys. Overwhelmed with goodness. Last night I got home to gifts and cards that had come in the mail. They blessed me so. I received two cards — one from my kind grandma and one from my sweet grandpa — the one who had a birthday this week. Grandma sent me $10 and some stamps (I mean, why not?) and called me “first class.” Grandpa sent me the cutest card that will go on my postcard wall and he told me that he is proud of me. He signed it, “Grandpa Dale (your special).” Heart. Bursting.

2. I also received a package from my mom. She sent me a sweet card and some tea and some of her famous cookies. She suggested we go to Israel together in May. So we shall. She is the bestest. She also sent me this picture of my brother and cousin napping together when they were little. A tiny brown boy and a pale little man. Best nappy time friends.

3. My final gift was a package from the Laura Ingalls Wilder Museum in Missouri. You guys. Yes, my heart skipped a beat. Laura and Almanzo moved to Missouri with their daughter, and Almanzo built them a wonderful house there. They lived there for the rest of their lives. It is where Laura wrote her books. My sweet and dear friend Kerry had ordered me a bookmark and a pin from the Laura museum. Kerry reads my bloggy and knows of my Ingalls obsession and decided to send me these gifts because she is thoughtful and kind and the awesomest. And just as I was sad that I was finished reading them! I will cherish these gifts, and you better believe that I will wear my pin.

4. So, these were all the gifts waiting for me when I got home last night. I cried with gratefulness — the gifts were lovely, but overall I was just so blessed and overwhelmed by the love of each of these people.

As I write this, I feel like I understand what it means to “love your neighbor as yourself” as Jesus asked us to do. Each of these people went out of their way to bring me cheer and remind me of God’s love and his provision. The Lord is so good to us, and he uses his people to show us his love. I am blessed.

5. OK, switching gears. We celebrated Purim last night. I’ll post a few more pictures next week, but I thought you might want to hear how it sounds when we read the Esther story and blot out the name of Haman every time it is mentioned in the text. So my friend Diana the Sailor made you this video. (Also, I’m wearing a feather boa because I was originally dressed as a peacock for my Purim costume.)

6. Charles in Charge (my dad) is coming to town this weekend! We’re going to hang out and go to the Broadmoor and listen to good music and be friends. It should be fun times.

7. If you’ve watched Friday Night Lights then you love Landry Clarke. Well, Landry (a.k.a. Jesse Plemons) in a band (not Crucifictorious) called Cowboy and Indian. They will be releasing a CD soon, but they have a couple of songs out on iTunes already. This is one of them. I love it. You should listen.

OK, I hope you have a good weekend and feel the love of Jesus and show it to others too. Lots of love.

Denise

If I Lay Here

March 2, 2012

I’ve heard that it’s Friday. That can only mean one thing. A very random list of things on this here bloggy.

1. I think we should start with this.

2. Yesterday I made gluten-free pancakes. They were a little flat and chewy, but overall, not too bad. I also had real maple syrup on them, which I thought I hated, but turns out it was pretty good. Next I will make maple candy in the snow like Laura did.

3. Speaking of which, I found this fun site where you can get recipes that are mentioned in the Little House books and take quizzes based on facts from the books. I just took a quiz and aced it. Jealous much?

4. Taylor Kitsch (a.k.a. Tim Riggins, a.k.a. my future husband) has been doing interviews for his horrible new movie John Carter. He was on Regis and Kelly (or whatever it is called now that Regis has apparently been replaced by guest hosts like Alec Baldwin) and he was lovely. Someone in the audience had a “Texas Forever” sign and he talked a bit about Friday Night Lights. The most important news is that apparently old Taylor is building a house in Austin and spent a lot of time researching for movie roles at UT where Jaci goes to school. Thus, she has been tasked with finding out his exact location so that next time I come to visit we can “run into him” and he and I can start our fairytale romance.

5. Vulnerability Corner with Denise: It has been a tough week. Pray for me. I’ll pray for you too.

6. What’s that? You would like to see another video interview of celebrities I like? OK, here’s Dax Shepard and Joy Bryant (Crosby and Jasmine on Parenthood) talking about their “wedding.” Also, I think I would like to work on the Parenthood set. They all seem to have so much fun together. And who doesn’t want to get to know all those crazy Bravermans better? Let’s make this happen — I could write for TV, right? Next season on Parenthood, Crosby’s best man’s younger brother comes to Berkeley and falls in love with a TV screenwriter from Colorado…

7. And I think we should end with this. Let’s just forget the world with Llama Patrol.

Have a blessed weekend!

Movie Madness

December 19, 2011

Well, hello, friends!

I am feeling so cheery because of the NO SCHOOL FOR FIVE WEEKS!!!!

To celebrate, I apparently went crazy and saw two movies in the theater this weekend. I never do that. But both of them were great, so it was totally worth it. The Muppets movie was so good — cute and hilarious and clean. When those chickens bawked out “Forget You” I lost it. I think I like their version of the song more than Cee Lo’s. I also saw Sherlock Holmes this weekend and it was excellent. Hilarious and clever and good action. I want to marry someone funny and clever like old Holmes. Let me know if you know of someone.

ALSO, I saw a preview for the new movie Battleship. It looks fairly awful — it’s based on the board game of the same name, and it basically looks like a cheap copy of Transformers. However, both Tim Riggins and Landry from Friday Night Lights are in it, so I will be there with bells on. Literal bells.

A bunch of friends came over yesterday to watch the Broncos game. We ate chili and dang quesadillas and cheered for Tom Brady’s demise. The streak is over, but there’s still hope. That Broncos team wants to win and I think they’ll be pretty successful.

Umm, I read the first two chapters of The Hunger Games last night, and it’s super depressing and kind of makes me want to die. I mean, they’ve explained what the Hunger Games are, and in case you were wondering, they do not sound fun. And life is pretty depressing for old Catnip and her family. And for the continent formerly known as North America. Why do people like these books? Does it stay awful like that? I don’t know if I can take it.

Christmas is so soon, you guys! I wish I had bought at least one present. I blogged over at Boundless about the book Touching Wonder by John Blase. It’s a look at the Christmas story, and it’s awesome. I’m not kidding — for someone so familiar with the story, it’s been eye-opening and awe-inducing. You should definitely read it.

So, remember how I’m celebrating the biblical holidays this year? Three of them are in the fall, and four of them in the spring. However, we have a couple in between that aren’t technically biblical holidays, but I’m going to celebrate them anyway. Neither Hanukkah nor Purim (the holiday related to Esther) are commanded by God, but both are mentioned in the Bible, and both are still widely celebrated by Jewish people, so I’m going to look into them and do a little celebrating as well. I mean, who doesn’t like to celebrate?

Hanukkah starts at sundown tomorrow night — I’ve got my menorah all ready. I’ll blog more about the holiday tomorrow so that we can be all knowledgeable before we start lighting our candles.

OK, hafta go not do homework! Have a great Monday, friends!

We So Excited

December 9, 2011

Gotta get down on Friday! Let’s get our list on, shall we?

1. One week left in the semester! Two tests, one bibliography, infinite amounts of whining to go!

2. Tonight I get to spend some time in Colorado Springs for some Christmas tradition with my friends. It may or may not include some Chili’s queso, a movie, and some singalong times at the Broadmoor.

3. False.

4. Yesterday in class, my professor said it’s important to read Revelation symbolically and with the understanding that John and his readers would have been able to comprehend it in their 1st century world. Which is pretty much the opposite of the way a lot of people read it.

5. This was the most disturbing thing I found on Pinterest this week.

6. Last night on Parks and Recreation, Leslie Knope said “Clear Eyes, Full Hearts, Can’t Lose.” My life is complete.

7. It’s Moo.

OK, have a great weekend, friends!

 

Wow, that’s a dumb title.

We’re doing list day a bit early folks, because tomorrow is a holiday and I will be too busy eating to be bothered with blogging. Priorities.

1. My friends Becca and Jeff and their sweet girls stopped by school yesterday! I’ve worked with Becca, but they recently moved to Kansas City and I never see her anymore. It was so good to catch up, and chat and whine about writing together.

2. I’ve gone to the airport twice in the last two days. Denver’s airport is not in Denver. It’s basically in Kansas. It’s seriously so far from where everyone in the entire world lives. I’m sure it’s nice that no one has planes flying over their houses, but seriously, airport. Move on in. Also, they have a demon horse at the airport. This is what greets you as you drive in:

It’s about nine million feet tall, and its eyes literally glow red like that. Welcome to Denver!

3. In Lauren Winner’s book Mudhouse Sabbath she talks about a lot of Jewish traditions, and one of them is the mourning period. When you’re in mourning for a relative who has died you say the Kaddish prayer. It is an odd prayer for mourning, because it says nothing about being sad. Instead, the prayer goes like this: “Blessed, praised, glorified, exalted, extolled, mighty, upraised, and lauded be the Name of the Holy One, Blessed is He, beyond any blessing or song.”

The mourner’s prayer is one of praise to God. Lauren says this: “Even in the pit, even in depression and loss and nonsense, still we respond to God with praise. This is not to say that the mourner should not feel what he feels — anger, disbelief, hatred. He can feel those things (and shout them out to God; God can take it). You do not have to feel praise in the intense moments of mourning, but the praise is still true, and insisting upon it over and over, twice a day every day, ensures that eventually you will come to remember the truth of those praises.” Beautiful.

4. Here is one of my favorite pictures from Pinterest lately.

5. What are you doing for Thanksgiving? I am going to spend time with friends down in Colorado Springs. I will be making my Grandma Winnie’s cornbread stuffing. What are you making?

6. I also like this picture. Coach. Tammy. Love.

6. Hey, if you want to, you can subscribe to my blog and get an email whenever I update it! Just click “hecks yes” at the bottom of the homepage. That way I won’t have to annoy my Facebook friends with so many links. Everyone wins.

7. I hope you have a lovely weekend and get some good rest. Be thankful for all He has done!

JeNOvah

November 3, 2011

That title is probably kind of sacrilegious.

I would like to start out by saying that some people named Chad (names have been preserved to expose the guilty) think it’s pointless and sad to blog about things like Friday Night Lights. Also, some people named Chad will probably get beaten up by Tim Riggins and The Smash. Just. Saying.

Well, how is your day? Yesterday I left my house one time to go to dinner with my sweet friend Martine. The rest of the time I was inside, wearing sweatpants, drinking coffee, and looking at the snow. I also managed to squeeze in about 4.2 minutes of work. It was so nice not to have to go anywhere though, you guys! Sometimes I really like not doing things.

So, here are some things my professor talked about in Hebrew the other night. Jehovah isn’t a word. Surprise!

Vowels aren’t original to Hebrew — they were added later to help with pronunciation. Also, vowels in Hebrew look like little dots and dashes under or over the consonants. And yes, it is terrifying when you’re in your first semester of Hebrew and you look at the Bible and all the insanely foreign letters are surrounded by Morse code.

So, a group of Hebrew scribes called the Masoretes were super detailed and good at transcribing. They’re the ones who put together the Hebrew Bible I use in my classes today, and it is their Hebrew text that we base our English Bible translations on.

Anyhoo, the Masoretes (along with the rest of the Jewish people) had a great reverence for God’s name, first revealed to Moses at the burning bush. We pronounce this name as “Yahweh,” although no one is exactly sure how it should be pronounced (because the vowels aren’t original). In our English Bibles, any time “Yahweh” is used, we see LORD in all caps instead.

The name Yahweh with no vowels.

Because God’s name is so holy, the Jewish people don’t pronounce it. The Masoretes wanted to make sure that people didn’t accidentally pronounce God’s name, so when they added vowels to the biblical text, they used the vowels that you would use to pronounce the word “Adonai” or “Lord” around Yahweh. This way, when people were reading and came to God’s name, they would see the consonants for Yahweh, but because of the vowels around them, they would know to pronounce it as “Adonai” out of respect for God’s name.

Is this making any sense? Are you sleeping? Rude.

Anyhoos, this is consistent through the Hebrew Masoretic text. But then someone like me — someone non-Jewish and not familiar with what the Masoretes were trying to do — came along and tried to pronounce the name of Yahweh according to the vowels. They didn’t know that those vowels were there so that you would say “Adonai” instead. They just started sounding out the word according to both the consonants and the vowels.

Seriously, any sense at all? Wake up! I’m almost done.

When you sound out the consonants and the vowels in the Hebrew text, it sounds like Ye-ho-vah. Jehovah.

So that’s where it comes from, but really it’s not a word — it’s just a mispronunciation of Yahweh according to the vowels that were put there to make sure you didn’t try to pronounce Yahweh. I guess it didn’t work. Poor Masoretes. They tried so hard.

As my professor pointed out, this is bad news for Jehovah’s Witnesses. And for all of our songs about Jehovah Jireh.

Why yes, you are very welcome for this fascinating Hebrew lesson!

Whew. That failed attempt at teaching I just did wore me out. I had better get back to not doing things. Talk to you soon!

Because My Throat is Sore

October 11, 2011

Oh, hi.

This will not be a very long or interesting or informative or useful or worth-your-time blog post because I don’t feel berry good today. Last night in my theology class I was very whiny because my eyes hurt and my head hurt, and I thought I was just making myself feel sick because I didn’t want to be in theology class. But I woke up with a real sore throat today! Poor, poor me. You should probably send me some treats to help me feel better. And some money. And some Tim Riggins.

Our next biblical holiday, Sukkot, starts tomorrow at sundown, so I will try to quit whining about my throat long enough to write something up. Also, for Sukkot you’re supposed to literally build a shelter, like with nails and wood and a hammer, so it’s sure to be disastrous. I’m not going to build anything, folks. Let’s not even pretend that will happen.

So, because I am not feeling that great, I went through my iPhone to find some recent pictures to share with you. It’s sure to be very, very exciting.

This is a car I saw while driving home from school one day. It’s a Ghostbusters car. For real. I’m not sure if it is actually used to bust ghosts, or if it’s a novelty item. Either way, I felt sad for the driver.

This is a trailer that is apparently a full-service dog washing business. A pickup truck was pulling it along, ready to wash some dogs. Can’t get out of the house? No problem. Tina will come to you. Don’t have running water at your house to rinse off your own dog? Have running water at your house, but you’re way too lazy to clean your puppy? DO NOT EVEN WORRY. Tina is on her way and will be at your place in a jiffy. Do it for your dog, you guys.

Speaking of animals, here is some beautiful fabric I saw at Hobby Lobby the other day. It’s soft, just like a cat. It’s cozy, just like a cat. And if you’re ever missing your cats, don’t even worry because this fabric is full of cats. Gorgeous. Jilly Bean, I have already started stitching this into a quilt for you.

So, I like vintage things, and this summer I’d been looking for a cute, green vintage fan for my room. Of course, I didn’t want to pay more than a dollar, so it was tough. But, I was at an antique fair one day and the winds of luck blew (hahaha! like a fan!) my way, you guys. I found this darling, vintage fan for $20!

Well, in an unfortunate turn of events, I am illiterate. I plugged my fan in and turned it on and got very confused because it was blowing hot air on me. Like really hot air. I looked at the tag on my fan and saw that it said “heater.” I had bought a darling little heater for $20. Because I’m awesome. The awesomeness continued because I apparently accidentally take screen shots on my phone a lot. After my heater/fan debacle I texted my friend Diana about it, and since I am unable to read and unable to use technology, I found this gem in my pictures.

 I can’t read, I take a lot of accidental pictures with my phone (I don’t even know how to purposely do a screen shot), and according to the space bar on my phone, I am typing in Spanish. Don’t be jealous, y’all. It’s quite a treat being me.

Well, lastly, and most awesomely, I will show you my new favorite thing on my fridge.

If you ever need a reminder to be awesome, to be good at your marriage, to have gorgeous hair, or to say “y’all” a lot, just think, What Would Tami Taylor Do? I got this sticker from Liz over at Peace, Love and Guacamole. She’s a blogger, and she made these, and she sent me one just because I asked! Read her blog. It’s what Tami Taylor would do, y’all.

K, I gotta go find someone to whine to about my sore throat. I’ll see you tomorrow to talk about Sukkot!