A Taxing Day

April 19, 2011

You guys, that is a clever title.

So, it was a crazy Monday, but at least I had the fashion challenge to keep me going. Here’s outfit #15 — halfway through!

I gave Monday some sass.

Blurry contrast time! You know it’s my favorite.

Shirt and belt: Target. Skirt: Gap. Shoes: DSW.

So, I had some tax-related drama yesterday. I filed my 2010 taxes ages ago because I had a plan to be On It. However, this year, I’m a full-time freelancer, which means that I should be filing quarterly taxes. For some reason, I remember the tax guy telling me that the first filing for 2011 was at the end of April. Obviously, I was wrong. They were due yesterday. I remembered this Sunday night after I went to bed, so on Monday after Hebrew, I spent the afternoon scrambling to file my estimated taxes for the year. You guys, it did not go well.

First, I tried to go to Turbo Tax and H&R Block to see if they could help me. Their systems automatically brought me to 2010 tax stuff, though, and I was not patient enough to figure out how to get into a 2011 system. Then I tried irs.gov but it wouldn’t load. Probably because there were 90 million other idiots like me trying to file their taxes at the last second. So, the worst scenario possible became a reality; I had to do my taxes by hand. It was awful, you guys. I haven’t done math in about 70 years, and I couldn’t remember how to multiply or add. This is why I became a writer! And then the form kept expecting me to know how to subtract lines from one another, and how to divide and how to handle percentages. Percentages! It was quite traumatic, but I managed to come up with an amount that I owed the government. It was probably an incorrect amount, but I do not care. If they want the right amount of money, they should teach me how to use Turbo Tax.

So then, I had to go mail these stupid checks so that they were postmarked in time. But I didn’t have any stamps. And the seminary does not sell them, so there. So, I went to the post office. I figured there would be a line, but I would just use the little machine to buy some stamps. However, downtown Littleton is known for its quaintness, especially in its post office, which has never heard of newfangled things like “machines” or “not having a line that stretches down the hall for miles.” SO, I had to drive over to Wells Fargo because their ATMs carry stamps. Whew! I pulled on in and inserted my card, and immediately, giant yellow letters started flashing “This machine is out of stamps!!! There’s no way you’re going to get your taxes filed on time, sucker!!!” (It said that.) So, taking everything in stride with joy and longsuffering as I always do, I skipped on over to WalGreens where I bought some stamps after standing in line behind a lady who was very choosy about her cigarettes. Then I of course considered it pure joy as I took a quick trip back to the post office to mail the checks.

In conclusion, I better have this figured out in four months when I have to file again. And someone should teach me how to do arithmetic.

Have a good day, friends! Pure joy. 😉

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9 Responses to “A Taxing Day”

  1. Lydia said

    I remember the first time I filed taxes way back when I was working at the local DQ and I had to file the taxes by hand. I was so excited to be filing taxes. Yes, the excitment was directly stemming from ignorance in my youthful days, well that and the refund I got back! It was like the government was paying me to work…hehehe. Gotta love taxes. Glad you found some stamps! I can’t believe the ATM was so rude. You should really lodge a complaint with Wells Fargo…don’t you love that their machines offer stamps (when they are stocked of course). 😉

  2. kerry said

    I really love your outfit and I really think that Target should sell stamps. That would make them pretty much perfect.

  3. Denise! This outfit is darling! I’m only on Day 14 and I feel like I’m running out of options! (And people to take my picture.) Yikes!

  4. Kelsey said

    Love the outfit! Your story is hilarious!!! 🙂 You know, I know a guy that could help with your arithmetic. Hee…

  5. denisemorris said

    Lydia — I totally love that they offer stamps! It’s such a nice feature.

    Kerry — I agree. If they sold stamps, Target could officially be called Heaven.

    Suzanne — I just stare at the items in my closet until some kind of combination pops out at me. I also look through Kendi’s archives a lot — that helps me come up with new ideas!

    Kelsey — I totally thought of Scott yesterday and how I needed his help. I will be coming to him in August!

  6. Rebecca selin said

    So I am going to jump in and be the detail jerk… If you are filing quarterly that will be in 3 months not 4 months, won’t it?

    Also, super cute outfits. I love them all. and you are so lucky you clothes don’t have food on them, like, constantly 🙂 lol

  7. denisemorris said

    Well, I think you file in April, August, December and April. So yeah, it’s kind of weird. 🙂

  8. Becca said

    Now I feel bad that I sent you that e-mail bugging you about the ABM workshop when I should have been sending you encouragement re: taxes and reminding you why it’s good to be a writer and a freelancer and a grad student all at the same time. In conclusion, I think you should treat yourself to a new shirt from Target for all of the trouble you survived. Wait…

  9. denisemorris said

    haha! Becca, Jaci said I should go shopping to cheer myself up too. In two weeks, I will be very cheery. 😉

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